The Best Gift

Why "Middle Path seeker" ?

Well, today I am not going to answer why.  I am going to tell you another thing I learned at my last visit to the temple.

Have you ever wonder what is the best gift from you to your parents?

Recently, there was a big news about Atlanta City Hall bribery scandal. Imagine you were the parent of the contractor who bribed your clients to win the contract. You knew your kid had been such a darling to all family members, had been a successful business man, paid for your house, and had a great family of his own. But once you discovered what he had done behind everyone's back, how would you feel?

Now imagine you were the parent of the City Hall official accepting the bribe. You knew your kid had been such a darling to all family members, had been a successful government official, paid for your house, and had a great family of his own. But once you discovered what he had done behind everyone's back, how would you feel?

Here are 5 simple daily training rules Buddhists call the Five Precepts that we all can practice to become a better person.  
1, Do not kill
2. Do not steal
3. Do not engage in sexual misconduct
4. Do not lie
5. Do not drink alcohol (until you get drunk)
(simplified from https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Five_Precepts)

What the contractor and the City Hall official have done probably could be called breaking the rule#4 Do not lie. 

Practicing the 5 simple rules daily goes hand in hand with practicing self awareness. When you have awareness of what you are doing,  your conscience will tell you the differences between right and wrong contributing to the Five Precepts you are being trained daily. 

With this, now, imagine you were a parent of an ordinary guy. He might not be rich but he had always been a good guy being trusted by everyone. No record of taking bribe, giving false statements, or any kind of misconduct. He had a happy family. He loved you and always supported you. You knew he always followed the 5 rules and he tried to have his conscience to guide him what was right and what was wrong.

Now, do you know the answer to the question "Have you ever wonder what is the best gift from you to your parents?" ?   The monk actually asked me during the temple visit.

"Being a good person.", simple as it sounds but that is the answer, right?

Mindfulness, you really helps me

Conscience, you really helps me.

Last year, during a short discussion at work, a colleague did not try to understand my points step by step. Just in the middle of the discussion, he said something like "This is wasting my time.", not just once but many times.  Then, I burst out "If this is wasting your time. It is wasting my time too." blah blah  After that, I tried to calm down and realized I should have been in control more. The discussion was over soon after that and I gave my colleague a sorry hug. I asked him never ever again say "this is wasting my time." as any discussion is meant to find a solution, so, it does not waste anyone's time. He also said sorry to me and we discussed how we should do better next time.

Since then, I have been trying to find the way to control myself not to burst out like that again. 

Finally, the trip to Wat Phramahajanaka gave me the answer. Mindfulness.

I started to practice being mindful or being aware of what I am doing all day.  It is not easy as sometimes the awareness is not always with me. At night I also started to pray and meditate.  Close my eyes, clear up my mind, observe my breath, in and out,... Just 5 minutes of meditation. Together with day time and night time practice, it really helps me to become a better person. 

At a short discussion at work this week, the same colleague disagreed (again) with my approach which everyone thought should be right. This time, I could calm down and offer a different approach that worked out for everyone including him. My conscience told me "No Anger. No Burst Out. Calm Down. Find Solution."

Having self-awareness

I went to Wat Phramahajanaka over Griffin, Georgia today. I had a chance to chant and meditate for about 2 hours plus listened to dharma taught by a monk there which I had not done so for quite a while already.

The monk taught me to always be conscious or have self-awareness in every moment of my daily activities starting from waking up in the morning, using bathroom, brushing teeth, having breakfast, and so on until the moment when I go to bed again at night. Now that I am typing in my first blog, I am also trying to have my conscience to tell me that my fingers are typing right now. He said it requires practice to always have conscience to guide my daily activities but once becoming habit, I should be able to calm down in any kind of situation. Then, wisdom and intelligence will arise and guide me to the rightness of my behavior.

That was the core lesson I have learned at Wat Phramahajanaka today.  But would that be all?  No, more to come soon.

Good Night for today!
Middle Path seeker